Quoth the Raven

Another strange dream?

I must start posting more often as I think I must be going through blog withdrawals?

I had a dream...

I was at work and decided to go out for coffee with a friend. But I couln't be bothered walking down the road to the cafe so I used a wheelchair, of sorts, on closer inspection it was actually a desk chair with wheels.

After having a coffee we were walking back to the office and I realised that I had forgotten my wheely chair so I ran back to the cafe, only to find that someone was using it! Well, I got my wheelchair back and went outside but my friend had disappeared. So I started to walk back to the office, with my wheelchair in tow, before I could make it I was confronted by a gang of lesbians -  I did say it was another strange dream? I realised that they had swiped my wallet but I managed to get it back, only to find that all my money was gone. (Money disappearing could definitely have something to do with us signing the papers for our new home just yesterday?)

I then proceeded to wheel myself back to my office, which now seemed like miles, and miles away. On the way I stumbled upon human remains by the side of the road. Strangely enough, I wasn't shocked, surprised or even scared. All I remember thinking was that I now had something to post on my blog! 

This is it!

You are now looking at our first home.

After many false alarms, this one is for real. We just signed all the paperwork and will have the keys this afternoon.

Hey, just read the ad - it sums it up!

Super charming! Sunlight streams thru leaded glass windows highlighting graceful archways, lovely mantled fireplace & hardwood floors. Wonderful, open floorplan w/formal living & dining rms flowing easily into the updated kitch. Large main floor master BR w/copius closet space. Double french doors (from both the kitchen and master bedroom) lead to huge, sunny deck ready for summer fun. Large, fenced yard. Upstairs - 2 darling add'l bedrooms & 3/4 bath. Fab locale -1/2 blk to Froula Park, blks to Greenlake/Whole Fds. Yes, hurry.

Hurry is what we did.

We made our offer, we were outbid by another couple, we then increased our offer and believe it or not, our offer was accepted!

The location is perfect; close to everything, quiet and it appears to be child-free. Not that we dislike children? I am just opposed to living near families who cannot control their screaming little ones. At the moment we live in a great house that has a lane behind the house for access to our carport. Unfortunately, every child from far and wide seems to think that it is a great place to play. I really don't have a problem with children playing unless it is one 8 year old who doesnt have fun unless she is screaming at the top of her lungs! I can deal with children playing and laughing; that is even nice...but to be upstairs trying to study when it sounds like someone is being blugdeoned to death behind my house, over and over, and over again, is just plain annoying. Am I just becoming a cranky 30-something?

Don't get too excited, this is not 'the baby' room - this is going to be converted into my study/library!

A day in the life of a VST Volunteer

'VST' for those who have not read any of my previous DV posts stands for Victim Support Team.

I just did another shift with the Seattle Police department today and I am exhausted. I worked 2nd watch which is 11am to 7pm. This may seem like a long time but you would be surprised how quickly the time passes when you are responding to a DV call out, or following up victims, or even just driving to the different precincts to make our presence known.

But today all my partner and I did was play the waiting game...

Waiting, waiting, waiting...and the waiting continued, waiting and driving.

Maybe is was the sunny weather? It was just too nice a day to beat someone. Or everyone was enjoying a day at the Bite of Seattle; eating, drinking and just having fun?

I am guessing that domestic violence was occurring, but for some reason the calls weren't coming in? Maybe some of you reading this are currently in a relationship that has some of the signs of domestic violence. Maybe your partner hasn't hit you yet, but all the signs of an unhealthy relationship are there?

Or maybe the violence has started? It could have been happening for a long time? Now is the time to seek help. I can tell you from personal experience that the violence does not decrease over time, it escalates. There are many resources to support both men and women who are living with domestic violence.

The National Domestic Violence Help Line

1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TTY)

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available to callers 24 hours a day, 365 days a year and able to provide services in over 150 languages. Hotline advocates are available to answer questions, provide safety planning and information as well as directly connect callers to domestic violence resources available in their local calling area. All calls to the Hotline are anonymous.

You've heard of sleep walking...

 

but have you ever heard of sleep laughing?

I haven't but I now know that it exists.

It was a normal Tuesday evening. I rushed home after work to study and tidy up the house. By 8.30pm Joel and I were having a casual meal while watching re-runs of Angel. I was asleep by 11pm.

Like I said, "A normal night"?

I don't even know what time it was but at some point during the early hours of the morning I was awoken by my own laughter! I am dead serious. Actually, it was my own laughter and Joel's voice "Faith, what are you doing? Your freaking me out!"

I recall that Joel kept asking me what I was laughing at? I vaguely remember telling Joel my dream in between fits of laughter. Hey, I'm not talking about a little giggle, I am talking about the kind of laughter that causes you to make piggy sounds, and causes tears to stream down your face.

I am having a little chuckle even just thinking about it. I awoke around 6am to probing questions and stares from my better half. I do remember the laughter but couldn't remember what the dream was about?

Apparently, I told Joel that I had dreamed about 'a cheerleader who was doing sommersaults, she fell and landed on a row of guitars'. I have no idea what this all means, or why it was so hilarious but I am sure there was probably more to it? Who can understand the mysteries of the human psyche?

Jealousy - the spice of life

I was doing some blog surfing and had to get my daily dose of Stephanie Klein. She is one of the greats in the blogging world...a captivating read, though sometimes too self involved but I guess that is basically what blogging is all about. Blogging about oneself, ones place in this world, ones own perceptions, while living the day to day grind that is life?

Stephanie's latest post touched on the itchy subject of jealousy, among other things. But it is the jealousy that interests me. Yes, what an ugly topic, and an even uglier trait to live with. Not that I have any experience with that? Ok, so I might - but you tell me one person who has never, ever, felt a twinge of jeolous rage coursing through their veins? To me, jealousy is like a poison that rips through your veins...ugly, messy, and definitely makes you feel like shit.

There are so many things that a person can get jealous over in this society that we live in, with its screwed up sense of worth. Either your not gorgeous enough, thin enough, smart enough, successful enough, etc, etc.....you may not be all of these things, but your boyfriend's girlfriend definitely is...which is why he left you for her.

I recall watching a television show a few months ago that showcased some of the wicked crimes commited by women in the heat of the moment. Jealousy definitely played a role in some of these crimes, but so did low self esteem, and the fact that the men involved in the equation appeared to be outright arseholes...not that there has ever been a decline in the number of arseholes that walk this earth. Well, after watching this 30 minute show I made a mental note that there are about 3 less arseholes in the world because of these jealous women?

There was the famous Bobbitt case that everyone knows about. Poor Mrs Bobbitt confessed to being a victim of domestic violence and there is just so much a woman can take before she cracks? Well she certainly got her own back? I guess she thought that cutting off something that meant alot to him would be a good form of payback? Yep, she hacked off his a good portion of his penis while he was asleep...end of story. Not quite as he went on to become a somewhat famous porn star after some much needed surgery. I guess all things do work out for the good? She did help him get his big break in front of the camera?

After just finishing an article about the case, it just so happens that she may have made up the allegations of domestic violence, it appears that she was dissatisfied with their sexual relationship and decided to do the deed.

The irony in all this is that the English verb 'to bob' means 'to cut short'. Note to Mr Bobbitt - change your name.

So the case wasn't really about jealousy after all?

Everyone must have heard the case about the jealous wife who couldn't deal with her husband's affair so she met him at the hotel and ran over him a couple of times. I still remember the image of the mercedes running over him; 2 or was it 3 times? Mere details. I also recall seeing his teeth laying on the ground a few metres from his lifeless body. I guess it made an impression on me they were both dentists. Unfortunately, the wife had hired an investigator to follow her husband, and the whole incident was caught on video. Which was fortunate for the prosecution.

I guess the moral of this story is:

1. Crime doesn't pay

2. Deal with your jealousy.

3. If the jealousy is warranted then deal with your partner; dump him/her - don't kill them! 

Virginia Woolf

At this point in my life I have yet to find another author that inspires such awe as Virginia Woolf.  In trying to find the words to define the exceptional writing skills of this woman, I am at a loss. I have no words that can convey the impact that her writing has made, on myself and numerous others.

Woolf has the ability, with the use of mere words, to lift the human spirit, to cause one to feel pain or to enable you to feel empathy for someone; a character that may not even exist, though her writing can make you think they do. Unlike myself with my somewhat limited vocabulary Ms.Woolf uses a whole gamut of words to bring about all that she is trying to convey to the reader.

In her writing it is as if she is trying to define a beautiful landscape to a person who was born without sight, which is very different than explaining it to a seeing person. For the person with sight already knows what a raging ocean or a garden in spring looks like, as they have seen it for themselves. But a person born blind could not ever know what these things look like. How would you describe a raging ocean to this person. How would you define the ocean, or the sand, the blinding rays of sunlight, or a winters night?

Virginia Woolf has this ability, and it is a pure joy to be invited into her world with her myriad of varied characters and vivid scenes, weaving lives with such intensity, such strength, not denying the at times, harsh realities of life.

Curb your Enthusiasm

"the funniest series on television..." San Francisco Chronicle

Larry David has it all - money, security, famous friends, a nurturing wife, a devoted agent, and a new oceanfront home.

So why is he still so intent on making a mess out of his life?

Just because you've made it doesn't mean you've got it made. Curb your Enthusiasm, the HBO comedy series starring Larry David as... Larry David!

Each half-hour episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm features verité-style footage of David (playing himself) at home, at work and around town, as he gets into predicaments with fictional and real-life personalities. With cast regulars Jeff Garlin (as manager Jeff Greene) and Cheryl Hines (as wife Cheryl) reprising their roles, the series features appearances by guest celebrities playing themselves or character roles.

Candid, unsparing and self-deprecating, Curb Your Enthusiasm brings the off-kilter comic vision of Larry David--co-creator and co-executive producer of one of the most lauded comedy series in TV history, Seinfeld--to HBO. The series blurs the lines between reality and fiction, as David (playing himself) and a cast of real and fictional characters are followed around Los Angeles by a ubiquitous camera that chronicles the private, often banal world of a (relatively) public man.

Having evolved from the 1999 HBO special Larry David: Curb Your Enthusiasm, this series proves how seemingly trivial details of one's day-to-day life--a trip to the movies, a phone call, a visit from some trick-or-treaters--can precipitate a "Murphy's Law" chain of misfortune to hilarious effect. Like George Costanza in Seinfeld, the protagonist of Curb Your Enthusiasm has a knack for getting himself into uncomfortable situations that end up alienating him from peers and acquaintances.

To keep the narrative fresh and spontaneous, Curb Your Enthusiasm is shot without a script; the cast is given scene outlines and often improvise lines as they go. The result is an unpredictable format that's unlike anything else on TV.

Poor Breeding Britney?

You really have to love Australian journalism. This article was in today's Sydney Morning Herald.

"As Live 8 confirmed, orphans are hot right now. And as this week's goss mags reveal, adoption is in and breeding is out.

Angelina Jolie is on the crest of the zeitgeist, having acquired a second orphan child, as Who reports, this time from Ethiopia. The mags are in frenzied speculation as to whether Brad Pitt has co-adopted the baby but, apart from a few grainy shots in New Idea of the couple alighting from a private jet, we still got nuthin'.

Which leaves us with poor Britney Spears, who has taken the unfashionable route of producing her own spawn. Woman's Day reports the harrowing news that the Britster has been spotted alone in a pet shop, sparking immediate panic that her husband, Kevin Federline (aka The Rat), has left her.

WD says the heavily pregnant Britney is worried about her husband's loyalty. She is seven months gone, which is the point when The Rat usually skives off to go kick it with some other homegirl. You could call it the seven-months-with-one-bitch itch."

Stick Figure by Christine Fontaine

Book Review

This is an autobiography about one persons journey through anorexia and bulimia. 

This is a wonderful story both, for those who are dealing with an eating disorder, and for those who know someone who has an eating disorder. It is as if Christine; the ill, is leading you and I; the healthy, through her life, a tangled web of lies, despair, and destruction finally leading to wholeness and health. 

I have read, and re-read this book. It is one woman's honest portrayal of the emotional and physical suffering that a victim endures.  For if you have an eating disorder you are a victim, a prisoner, of that illness. Unfortunately, it is not as easy as taking the advice of the uninformed and 'just eating' for the illness resides much deeper than that in the human psyche.

"...and was skinnier than everybody else and was amused...me? But tha's not what felt good. What was good was my free body, unhidden, free. Years of holding in my stomach, trying to hide my body from judgement, of trying to escape being physical no longer mattered - nobody could judge me now. My body was no longer restricted by heavy self - consciouness..."

A slight case of euphoria

euphoria: defined by Websters dictionary as 'a feeling of well-being or elation'

Yes, euphoric is exactly how I am feeling right about now.

Why the elated mood, you ask? What! I don't act elated all the time? I guess not, unless I am watching reruns of 'Curb your enthusiasm' - awesome show. No, I don't get depressed watching the show, elation, usually followed by alot of laughter.

Anyway why am I feeling so good? Let me see...a short work week; even shorter being that I am now taking Friday off. I don't have to sit in on another math class until Monday evening, yes, that alone is reason enough to open a bottle of champagne. Or could it be that I am feeling pretty grand with the new home we just purchased. Yep, you heard me correct - WE ARE PROUD NEW HOMEOWNERS!

I guess I shouldn't get too excited, look what happened last time we became homeowners? We were homeowners for about 3 days, then the inspection revealed stuff that we didn't want to live with. And I'm not talking about the wrong colour interior paint, I am talking about a shaky foundation. Like I said, "Stuff we really didn't want to live with".

So we are back at square one and so glad that we are, this home is perfect, or close to it.

It has everything that I was looking for; location, design, size, old world charm with a contemporary edge...and lots of sunlight which is a must in this dreary city (not that you would know it by the weather we have been having lately!)

Oh, well, maybe I should wait until the keys are in my sweaty little palm and then I will tell you all about it.